I messaged Ellie and told her about Alison’s plan for afternoon tea, because she’s the only person I’ve talked to about it, and she said it sounded hilarious, as long as I didn’t tell Stephen. I said I never would, and nothing happens anyway, except for being served by a nude man. That doesn’t count as infidelity in my book.

I can’t think of anyone else that might be interested. I definitely can’t ask any of the women I work with because the conversation might always turn to my own little kink.