I said I was ready for the run but it didn’t make it any easier. I think because it’s two weeks since I had sex at all, and last weekend with Elise just sort of fizzled out, I’m feeling a bit horny again. I didn’t sleep that well and I dreamt about doing the run naked, like Mel had threatened to make me do, except it was with everyone else, and they were obviously not naked, and then I had to go to a meeting straight afterwards, and still had nothing to wear…

Which reminds me: it’s naked bike ride next weekend! I hope Ha is still up for it like she said.

The rest of the day was chores and home admin, and reading up for work.

I hung around after work for a drink and ended up chatting with Tim and Rachel in the sun outside a pub. Tim’s definitely a lot more normal with me now, and Rachel always has been, but I couldn’t help but talk about work with them, because we have nothing else in common and all the other things I could talk about aren’t appropriate for work colleagues (despite what Tim already knows).

I was home early and ready for the run tomorrow morning!

I did it today: I found Tim in the kitchen and said we had something to discuss, and did he have time after work, which he did.

I thought we’d go for a drink or something but we were actually done by the time we’d walked and talked. I sort of made something up about doing the strip dance because someone had put me up to it, but it wasn’t going to happen again, and I’d really appreciate it if he kept it to himself. He’d already said he would, and he had, and then added that I didn’t have to worry about him losing respect for me because he thought I was great to work with and everyone’s into different things and it was also great that I could be so confident and powerful at work (ha!) and also confident about my body (also ha!).

Anyway, I think we’re all clear now, and I also think I like Tim better. He seemed more relaxed somehow. Maybe before he was nervous because he was intimidated and seeing a slightly more human side of me was a good thing.

I had another tetchy meeting with Tim today, bossing him around so he knew his place. I feel bad now and doing Pilates didn’t really help. Maybe I should take up boxing.

Ana and Ellie have both said yes to tea at Alison’s on Sunday! I don’t think there’s anyone else I can invite, and certainly not anyone from work. I don’t think Mel would like it, and I don’t really know about Elise. Four women and Russ is plenty.

I still haven’t mustered the courage to talk to Tim.