Exhibitionist Diary – Monday 23rd December

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It’s always a strange time to be in the office, just before Christmas, because half the company has booked the time off for the whole week. It was quite a productive day for me, though, going through the work backlog. Neither Tim nor Rachel

And now I’ve written about the boring stuff I guess I should talk about my evening with Mel.

I felt all kinds of seedy, leaving the office in a long coat and boots and with my clothes in my bag. It was chucking it down with rain too, and I was huddled up in my coat because it was a bit cold even in Mel’s apartment block. It all nearly went very badly wrong as I was about to knock on the door when one of the neighbours arrived home! Another twenty seconds and I’ve have been standing there starkers! Although maybe it wouldn’t have been too bad as it was quite a cute guy, maybe thirty years old, so perhaps standing around naked in the corridor is a good way to meet someone.

I pretended I was waiting for Mel to answer, and then when he was through the door I knocked and quickly took off my coat. As usual, she took an age to get to the door, and I was wondering if maybe she wasn’t even in! But then she opened it, looking as elegant as ever in black leggings and a tight top, while I felt bedraggled from the rain and very vulnerable standing there in nothing but a pair of calf boots.

She let me in and I put my coat down and took off my boots, and then as she asked me how I’d been over the past few days she put the collar around my neck, the cuffs around my wrist and then connected them both together with a strap that ran down my back. I followed her into her office and sat down as best as I could, conscious of how my shoulders were pulled back and my chest pushed out, and already wishing that maybe we could skip the life coaching and she could just bring me to climax and get it over with.

But instead she started with asking me about work, and then moved on to asking me about how I’d felt at the party. As before, being strapped up as I was, I felt as if I had nothing to hide. I told her that I was surprised about her and Jason, but fine with it, and that I’d really enjoyed mingling with a load of clothed strangers while I was in the nude and it wasn’t as if they didn’t care, but they didn’t ask questions. Apart from Deborah, and then I told her about the office party, and she laughed and said she had no idea that that would happen otherwise she would have given me a bigger mask. I said Deborah seemed to find it very amusing, and Mel said “Well, she would,” and left it at that.

Mel said that it was going to be difficult to set up more encounters with strangers where I was nude, so I was just going to have to broaden the circle of friends that knew! That sounds terrifying, but on the positive side I don’t have a lot of friends. She said we’d also have to try something more public next time, because she could tell from the café on Thursday that I really wanted to be not only exposed but also completely and helplessly out of control. I blushed at that, because it’s true, but I wouldn’t have admitted it.

Mel asked me about what I was looking for, both physically and emotionally, and I couldn’t really explain it. She said it was telling that I’d kept saying I was looking for a man when it didn’t seem like I really knew, and that I wanted to settle down but maybe I didn’t really want to, and perhaps I should just try everything, while I can. That perhaps what I think I want is driven more by what society expects than by what I really want.

It was kind of exhausting, plus I couldn’t move my arms, because of the cuffs, and sitting with my shoulders back and chest out was quite tiring too.

But just as I was getting tired enough to start feeling uncomfortable, Mel said the hour was up and she had other work to get through tonight. It seemed like nothing else was going to happen before I left that night, and then I wondered if Mel had planted the seed in my mind deliberately, and as I was standing in my boots in her hallway with my coat over my arm and about ready to leave I decided to give her a little goodbye hug. And I was feeling brave, so I ran down my hands over her back and pulled her a little closer. But Mel laughed and said it was a nice idea, but she wasn’t the one for me but maybe she knew someone. That sounded very intriguing.

And then when I got home she said she’d see me in two weeks but I wasn’t allowed to touch myself unless she said so. And I wasn’t allowed to even ask. She’s just so unfair!

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