Exhibitionist Diary – Thursday 23rd July 2020

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Well.

I was nervous all day about talking to Tim, and I didn’t do at all well at hiding it. We went to a local pub after work and I tried to engage in chit-chat on the way but it didn’t work. So I just had to tell him over a drink that I was finding it difficult to separate work and outside life. And Tim was so nice it was unbelievable, and I felt so bad I can’t even describe.

He said he could tell I was having trouble and that he’d started looking for another job! I had to tell him that no way should he do that just because of me, and he said he didn’t want to but he didn’t want me to be uncomfortable. So I said don’t think about that, I’ll get over it, and I actually felt better because he was prepared to go so out of his way to respect my feelings, when all of this was my fault.

I asked him a bit about Linda, because I wanted to see if I could get out of Saturday. He told me about how they used to go out but sometimes she’d invite other male friends over and flirt, all the time naked, and he said he couldn’t handle it, until one day she just seemed to be going out with some new guy Gary (who I’ll meet) and they hadn’t even officially split up. He said they’ve never even really talked about it.

The bad news is that Mel has told Linda to report back on the whole thing, and not to let me out of it, to make sure I didn’t wear a stitch of clothing… he seemed embarrassed about saying that. But then he said not to worry that he thinks it’s a double-date or something because he’s started seeing someone, but he hasn’t told Linda because he doesn’t want her nosing into it. So as far as he was concerned it was just dinner with a friend and he wouldn’t do anything to make me feel awkward. I didn’t say that I already felt awkward.

But by the time I got home I felt a lot better about things, but I also felt distinctly like Tim has a lot better handle on all of this than I do.

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