Everyone’s de-toxxing at this time of year so Friday nights are very quiet, so I just came home, got naked and wandered around the flat. And strangely, I realised it’s been a week since I masturbated at all, which is funny given how bursting I was before Mel let me, so I saw to that too. With the curtains closed, I might add, because I don’t want things to take a funny turn with Alison and Russ.