Exhibitionist Diary – Sunday 27th October 2019


On the one hand my life seems to be standing still, but on the other I’m doing all kinds of things for the first time! All kinds of naughty things, and I can’t tell if these are things no-one else has done or if I’m just late to things.

But to last night with Ellie.

We met sometime after six, with me in my skirt, stockings, heels and zipped black top, and Ellie wearing a really tight and actually quite tiny dress, and it was only when I looked closer that I could tell she was wearing sheer tights (which I’m sure weren’t stockings, because her dress was too short) as some protection against the cold.

We exchanged a quick hug and went for a drink and a gossip. And again I felt guilty for not even mentioning my time with Mel, although I did tell her about my night with Ha, which she listened to with wide eyes. She said she envied me that I had a friend who seemed to enjoy “that kind of thing” with me. (It was funny that neither of us really mentioned being naked, as such, out loud in a public place. It would have been a very odd conversation to overhear, but we knew what we meant.)

I asked Ellie if she’d dared herself to do anything at her place. She said she thought her flatmates would find it very weird if she started wandering around in the nude, which might be true but if she doesn’t try she’ll never know. I told her, again, that any time she wanted to hang out at mine she was welcome, and we both knew it was implicit that clothes would not be required. Maybe not even allowed.

Things were getting a bit steamy and we went for dinner at a Japanese place. There’s something much sexier about eating with chopsticks, but my heart rate was higher the whole time wondering if she’d mention anything about my dare. I wasn’t going to ask because I was really getting worried about what it might involve.

Somehow we killed a couple of hours eating and talking and suddenly it was nearly ten o’clock. I suggested going for a quick drink somewhere, but Ellie said she wanted to go to a club. It’s been a while since I went to one, to be honest, but she seemed so full of energy it was enough for both of us.

I also have danced for quite a while and forgot how much fun it is. Plus it felt very sexy dancing with Ellie in her slinky little dress, even if we sometimes got guys trying to join us. I just wasn’t in the mood to pick someone up, not now we were having so much fun. Maybe I should have been but I just can’t see how that kind of place is a good way to meet anyone.

We were at the bar having a cocktail and a rest when I had a look around and a thought occurred to me. “Do you think this a gay club?” I asked Ellie. She looked at me and laughed and nodded. “At this time of night it gets that way,” she said, “But not exclusively.” She looked around again and then said. “It’s fun.”

I had to agree, it was fun, but for the first time I noticed how many same-sex couples there were, and a couple of girls next to us in the bar were kissing. I also noticed how many women were looking over at us, especially at Ellie and her tight dress.

Ellie asked me if I’d ever been with a girl. I shook my head, because I don’t think Mel counts because we didn’t kiss and it was only her hands on my body. I asked her if she had and just said “not really”, which left me more intrigued. She said she’d kissed a girl at college but nothing else happened.

“So time for your dare,” she said without warning. My heart sunk because I dreaded what was coming. But I thought if was going to end up streaking anywhere then a gay club was probably the best place for it.

Ellie complained that last time she’d made up a dare she realised it was something I’d already done before, so this time she knew it was new to me: I had to pick a girl, go up to her and flirt and at some point say “I’m just curious, but can we kiss? Because I’ve never kissed a girl before.”

I could feel my face burning already. Not at the thought of kissing a girl, but at having to talk to a stranger and the almost certain rejection. But my discomfort was Ellie’s delight and she actually clapped her hands in excitement, saying how pleased she was that it looked like she’d finally found something that was difficult for me.

Then she asked me who I was going to pick. There were a few women who had been looking at us, and as soon as Ellie looked in their direction one of them smiled back. I said to Ellie I thought they were interested in her rather than me, then Ellie looked me up and down and said “It looks like it wouldn’t take much to get you out of that top and skirt. Then they’d be interested in you.”

I was glad she hadn’t thought to make that part of the dare. But then I had an idea so I turned to her and said: “I think I’ve chosen.” And she looked around and said “Who?”, and then looked back at me, and I kept staring at her and said: “I’m just curious, but can we kiss? Because I’ve never kissed a girl before.”

She giggled and said I couldn’t be serious but, honestly, it should have been obvious. She tried to say I couldn’t choose her, but I told her that nothing had said I couldn’t, so I had. Then she comically closed her eyes and pouted her lips, but I wasn’t going to let her get away with that, so I moved over to her, told her not to pull a face, and waited until she’d opened her eyes before I moved in.

I don’t know what I was expecting, but it was so different to kissing Kieran. Her mouth was small, and so gentle, and her lips were soft, and there was the subtle smell of perfume and soap that made me breathe a bit more deeply. That made me feel a bit dizzy, which just added to the experience, and I wondered if Kieran had got the same from kissing me. Either way: it was really nice.

And then we didn’t know what to say to each other and somehow carried on as if it had never happened. We danced a bit more then went our separate ways home. Then in bed later I wondered all along if Ellie had set up this dare hoping exactly for that outcome and I had butterflies in my stomach, because I have no idea still whether a relationship with another woman is something I want to experiment with.

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