I had the most embarrassing dream last night. I was in Jo’s office but completely naked, and I had to explain why I’d missed a deadline and she said we’d have to go and explain it to the client, and then I followed her through the office with everyone staring at me. And then suddenly we were standing on the tube and all these clothed bodies were pressed against me and for some reason Jo put her hand on my breast… I was so horny when I woke up there was only one thing for it, of course.

It’s weird because I’ve never dreamt about a woman before, not like that. I thought I’d be too old to go through that kind of a phase.